Loud, obnoxious, and unreasonable

Bob thinks his mom is a fucking idiot most of the time. She is always so loud and obnoxious and unreasonable. I tell him to be nice.

Desiring to see the rest of the goods that go along with that sexy ass

There are advertisements on isohunt that always catch Bob's eye. They usually feature a very attractive part of a very attractive woman, along with the text: "Want to see the rest?" Bob, of course, really wants to see the rest.

The latest one really made him want to click on the link. It featured the lower half of a woman, viewed from the back. The part of her upper torso that is viewable is covered by a t-shirt. On the bottom she is wearing a skimpy thong. This thong is so skimpy that is only visible at her waist. So in effect, it looked for all the world like a completely naked ass. Bob decided that, whoever the model was, that she had one of the sexiest asses he had ever seen. Bob then started to wonder what Rosaline would look like wearing her thong without any pants on.

As you can imagine, I did not like this line of thought one bit, but I didn't have to do anything about it. Bob decided that he really wanted to see the rest of that beautiful woman, so he clicked on the link. It led him to a registration page for a dating website. The let down was so great that he has pretty much ignored the beautiful ass since then.

Click to see the beautiful ass

Mother Fucking Know it All

Bob has this stupid mother fucker that he rooms with at school, and he is a total mother fucking know it all! Someone was bitching about how some wireless network wasn't working, and the mother fucking know it all was like "It never works at night." It never works at night Bob's ass! So Bob was like "It just needs to be powercycled (while thinking: you stupid mother fucker). It now works. It doesn't work well, but it works. Bob assumes that the reason the network isn't working well is because of all the traffic on it at the moment. Stupid ass mother fucking know it all.

Good Luck Chuck

Bob is thinking that he really wants to see this movie:





Ah, the beautiful Jessica Alba!

"Is it all right if I hit on your daughter?"

Bob was at a place the other day, and he is positive that a couple of the girls there were checking him out. How does he know that they were checking him out? Why, he was checking them out at the same time, of course. One of the girls looked like she had some decent breasts. She didn't flaunt them with her shirt like little Ms. Slutty Pants. Her shirt just showed enough to grab Bob's attention and say "Hey, look at me!" Bob was contemplating going over and saying "hi," but from the conversation drifting over from their table, he deduced that she was there with her family. If he went up and said "hi," he might as well walk up to her father and ask, "Is it all right if I hit on your daughter?" Bob decided to do neither.

No Meat Beatage

Bob resisted the urge last night! He did not beat his meat! I’m so proud of him.

Breath-taking voluptuousness

Bob watched a movie last night. In it, there was a rather attractive woman with what Bob thought were very nice breasts. One shot showed a close up of the woman, displaying her body from about the tits up. She was wearing an outfit that revealed just about all of her breasts above the nipple line. So in effect, about all that was viewable was this actress's face and her boobs. That in and of itself is pretty much unremarkable, but she was breathing very heavily. Her mostly bare breasts were moving up and down, accenting their breath-taking voluptuosness.

It was not a very long clip at all, so I could not berate Bob for having watched it. He didn't masturbate whilst thinking about it, so no foul there. All in all, I think Bob handled that difficult situation rather admirably!